What I Will Be Watching Instead Of The Superbowl

"Ken, I want to go back to Vietnam," I said.
"What," he answered, "right now?"



The Lover (French: L'Amant) is a 1992 drama film produced by Claude Berri and directed by Jean-Jacques Annaud.

Based on the semi-autobiographical 1984 novel by Marguerite Duras, the film details the illicit affair between a teenage French girl and a wealthy Chinese man in 1929 Vietnam.

The Lover is a passionate, deeply sensual and tender love story with very generous lashings of magnificent smut.

It stars Jane March as The Young Girl, and Tony Leung as The Chinese Man.

It also features a breathtakingly beautiful soundtrack by Gabriel Yared.

Oh, Eric Roberts. What On Earth Happened?

So last night I was flipping channels and I stumbled across some doggerel on VH-1 called Celebrity Rehab or some other such twaddle. You know, H-list "celebrities" check into a rehabilitation facility, have their every foible filmed, and then that awful Dr. Drew "helps" them.

Yuck.

Imagine my surprise, my ghastly surprise, to learn that one of the "celebrities" is none other than Eric Roberts, brother to Julia and the far better actor of the two. What is a talent of his caliber doing on a show like Celebrity Rehab? How dreadful.

Roberts seared his way into my memory in Bob Fosse's Star 80, with his electric portrayal of small-time pimp Paul Snider, the man who murdered 1980 Playboy Playmate of the Year Dorothy Stratten before turning the gun on himself. In this scene from Star 80, Snider demonstrates his meticulous, albeit creepy, preparations to meet those assembled at the Playboy Mansion.

From 1983: Bebe Buell

Buell says in her most excellent memoir Rebel Heart that her on-again, off-again paramour Elvis Costello was disgusted by this layout, so much so that it lead him to dump her for the eight millionth time (big deal; Costello's a putz). Liz Derringer, wife of rocker Rick, was one of Bebe's closest friends at the time.

I love whores.

From 1976: Kitty Porn!

Don't be fooled by the cute packaging. Whisker Lickins was, in fact, a hardcore underground kitty porno starring none other than The King Of All Kitty Sluts, Morris!

Let's just put it this way: you have no idea the depraved things Morris would do for chicken and liver flavors.